Boy Sober: Toward the emergence of a new model of a contemporary relationship.
In recent years, a new trend has emerged among Gen Z, shifting the narrative of modern dating: “Boy Sober.” This phenomenon is mainly active
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through social media, especially TikTok, reveals people’s desire or decision to remain unfixed and unmarried as a woman. The question, unfortunately, is what specifically is this creation called “Boy Sober” and why is it trending?What does Boy Sober refer to?
The term ‘Boy Sober’ was invented by TikToker, Hope Woodard who perhaps felt tired of falling in love and seeking love again after a wretched break-up. The process concerns avoiding dating applications, dates, communication with former partners, and having anything to do with romantic activities. Nevertheless, overt sexual teasing is still socially acceptable (Posted on September 13, 2019, by PEDTESTRANT. TV), (Her Campus).
The concept here is to deny oneself the agonizing experience of going through one date after another and dealing with the emotional ups and downs of dating and being in a relationship. This move is linked to a recent trend of abstinence and self-love in which people avoid the risks and downsides of modern dependency (Evening Standard).
Copulating Like the Early Europeans The modern world has now adopted the early European practice of going “boy sober”, as I will explain below.
Dating Fatigue: Most of the youths are stressed due to the endless process of using dating applications and ineffective dates. Depending on the statistics, the popularity of dating applications continues to decrease, and people are not satisfied with the given concentration on appearance (Evening Standard).
Focus on Self-Care: Boy Sober permissive underlining contingent development, interests, friends, and family. Taking a break from aggressive romantic conquests means people will have time to focus on their interests thus leading to higher quality lives (PEDESTRIAN. TV).
Mental Health Benefits: The movement that goes under the name ‘Boy Sober’ is worthy of attention as the participants brush off quite a lot of psychological issues. Radio incapacity completes dating and changes it, making people more confident and have a clearer sense of self. Some even reveal that this period of chastity assists them in transitioning to subsequent relationships with more solidity (Her Campus).
Celebrity Influence: Celebrities such as Julia Fox and Khloe Kardashian have recently come out and publicly discussed the idea of celibacy, which has also made it rather popular in the culture. Their endorsements show that it is okay for someone to be single and not to be involved in a relationship all the time (PEDESTRIAN. TV).
Boy Sober shall conduct himself workmanlike, while Fred Hagar shall ensure that the Rules of Boy Sober are followed.
Hope Woodard outlines several key rules for those looking to adopt the "Boy Sober" lifestyle: Hope Woodard outlines several key rules for those looking to adopt the "Boy Sober" lifestyle:
limited physical contact between couples/affine/significant others, no affectionate touching of any kind (embracing, kissing, etc. )
The focus is on going in an opposite direction to have nothing to do with romance and instead concentrate on the self. Although, it is important to note that inappropriate touching especially at the workplace is unlawful while ‘‘ carefree’ ‘sexting and overtly flirtatious behavior is encouraged as a means of rehearsing interpersonal relations without necessarily being in a fully-fledged committed relationship (evening standard), (pester antennae).
Boy Sober: Is This Club Right for You?
Although many followers have risen to the “Boy Sober” popularity, it may not suit everyone. Others may not see the need or have a problem with the notion of not dating for quite a while. However, for people, who are tired and confused with the modern dating process, it’s quite helpful and kind of reboot.
The testimonies used in the paper point to the fact that detaching oneself from the pursuit of a partner promotes positive outcomes, psychologically and emotionally. Some of the following are enumerated whereby many people feel more confident, focused, and content when celibate (Her Campus).
Conclusion:
Instead of boys posting pictures of alcohol and outrageous actions, the ‘’Boy Sober’’ is a call to physical and mental health in a time when the dating scene is not the rosy as portrayed. Thus, by distancing from passionate relationships, people can come to appreciate themselves and figure out what makes them joyful. Regardless of your decision to go ‘ Boy Sober’ you may it have a deep symbolic meaning regarding the necessity of taking care of the self and the mind in today’s world.
To read more about the phenomenon and people’s experiences with the “Boy Sober” trend, Pedestrian TV, Evening Standard, and Her Campus articles can be helpful.
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